Why You Can’t Stop Being So Crazy Busy
It’s no secret that being crazy busy week after week, month after month is one of the main contributors to anxiety.
Being too busy, and seeing no end in sight, is one of the biggest problems my clients need help with.
Most people try to solve this problem the wrong way. They try to become more organized, more efficient, more productive, better at time management, and better at multi-tasking. They also cut back on sleep in order to get more done.
Any of this sound familiar?
And if they do figure out how to get the same number of things done in less time, then they fill up that extra time with more to do’s. Result: more stress and anxiety.
If doing too much is the problem, how can doing more be the answer?
If you want to get to the root of this problem, I suggest you ask yourself some very important questions:
• What stops you from saying “no” to more things?
• Conversely, what keeps you saying “yes” to things?
• What stops you from drawing some boundaries?
• What stops you from making some downtime for yourself?
• How much choice do you have in being crazy busy? (Keep asking that one.)
• Have you tried sleeping more instead of less?
• If you had extra downtime, would you know what to do with it?
• Are you able to sit quietly and relax, if you wanted to?
• Does crazy busy get in the way of you really being present to the ones you love?
Payoff?
Perhaps the most important question to answer:
Is it possible you get benefits or a payoff from continuing to be so crazy busy?
Consider these common reasons why people perpetually stay busy (there are many other reasons as well)…
1. Discomfort with quiet time.
Some people feel so uneasy and just sitting idle with themselves – any distraction feels better than that anxiety and uneasiness.
In fact, scientific studies have shown that people would rather give themselves mild electrical shocks then spend 6 to 15 minutes alone with their thoughts.
2. Avoidance.
Crazy busyness helps you subconsciously avoid things you really don’t want to face. I’m talking about things like conflict, criticism, unhappiness, relationships and emotional intimacy, vulnerability, and fear of not being good enough. Avoiding all of that can definitely feel like a payoff.
3. Sense of importance.
Being busy gives you bragging rights. It has become a competition and a misplaced sign of success to be busier than the next guy.
Your Gravestone
What would you want inscribed on your gravestone? How about this:
She sure got a lot done!
Probably not. But crazy busy causes you to live your life in a way that puts the highest value on getting it all done.
What would you really like your gravestone to say? How would you like your loved ones to feel about the time you shared with them on this Earth?
That leads to the most important question… What’s one thing you can do today to help ensure that result?